Mallu Lover, Ex-United Indian School, Kuwait!

WOW! I actually received an invitation to a blog that’s even more obnoxious than mine. Thanks Dickie boy. But since I’ve got some catching up to do, I’ll start without further ado.

He is a mallu-lover if ever there was one. I thought he was from beyond the Vindhyas. But he seems educated and he’s got a Goan-sort of name. Hmmm… Gotta ask his mom about that. (Not the education, stupid.) I could give you his gmail id and you could leave a message for his mom too. But then again, I don’t trust you to be civil. For my part, I am going to encourage the poor, pathetic cur to continue to fret, fume, huff, and spurt his putrid bile all over his lap and his blog. Because – and this is pure conjecture – but I think there some of that abused-child-crying-for-attention Freudian shit in all this.

Why? Why, you ask? Because his blood-curdling spite is all directed not just at mallu oil-balls – it’s aimed at his not-that-long-ago schoolmates! He has gone ahead and declared the entire Non Resident Indian academic community in Kuwait as being – wait for it – GAY. Bloody shit! I mean at an age, when he should be out sniffing pheromones on sidewalks and shopping malls, and trying hard to get into the pants of some rabid off-duty female US Army corporal from Alabama for some of that sweet Abu Ghraib-style BDSM, our sweet disfunctional dungpile is recollecting and recounting the various locations that he copped a feel of fat mallu ass (No, he doesn’t mention male or female.) Urgh! Is that debased or what?

Now, now let’s not be judgemental here. This is an individual who genuinely needs help. I am going to recommend a fleshtorch(TM). It might help. Or he can go completely au naturale and try out his friendly mangy neighbourhood mongrel bitch – if she’s willing! Remember, otherwise it’s rape, and I don’t condone rape – whether it’s a pomeranian or a mallu. But whatever outlet he finally chooses, he needs sympathy (and possibly, sperm donors, if he’s planning to leave his mom’s ample bosom anytime soon to embrace a virgin bride.) I wish him luck – lots of it. And maybe a pile of antacids and an year’s supply of online viagra prescriptions to go with it.

Time to to get your rocks off, boy-o. Maybe you should be trying to get into the abayas of those Kuwaiti sweetknickers instead of going on and on about their supposed phone sex fantasies with your mallu-macaque of a tuition teacher. Let it out. Spray it, Dickie-boy. Get off already. Your mama may not have told you this, but you seem old enough.

Tags: kambi katha, Kuwait